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Poker Quotes

  • "The guy who invented poker was bright, but the guy who invented the chip was a genius." Anon
  • "Last night I stayed up late playing poker with Tarot cards.  I got a full house and four people died." Steve Wright
  • "Most of the money you'll win at poker comes not from the brilliance of your own play, but from the ineptitude of your opponents." Lou Krieger
  • "Old card players never die, they just shuffle away." Anon
  • "Industry executives and analysts often mistakenly talk about strategy as if it were some kind of chess match. But in chess, you have just two opponents, each with identical resources, and with luck playing a minimal role. The real world is much more like a poker game, with multiple players trying to make the best of whatever hand fortune has dealt them. In our industry, Bill Gates owns the table until someone proves otherwise." David Moschella
  • "If, after the first twenty minutes, you don't know who the sucker at the table is, it's you." Anon
  • "Poker exemplifies the worst aspects of capitalism that have made our country so great." Walter Matthau
  • "The commonest mistake in history is underestimating your opponent; it happens at the poker table all the time." David Shoup
  • "Your best chance to get a Royal Flush in a casino is in the bathroom." V.P. Pappy
  • "I must complain the cards are ill shuffled till I have a good hand." Jonathan Swift
  • "Poker: The art of civilized bushwhacking." Nick Dandalos
  • "Whether he likes it or not, a man's character is stripped at the poker table; if the other players read him better than he does, he has only himself to blame. Unless he is both able and prepared to see himself as others do, flaws and all, he will be a loser in cards, as in life." Anthony Holden
  • "Cards are war, in disguise of a sport." Charles Lamb
  • "I've often thought, if I got really hungry for a good milk shake, how much would I pay for one? People will pay a hundred dollars for a bottle of wine; to me that's not worth it. But I'm not going to say it is foolish or wrong to spend that kind of money, if that's what you want. So if a guy wants to bet twenty or thirty thousand dollars in a poker game, that is his privilege. Jack Binion
  • "You have it in your power to turn a bad-beat around simply by realizing this simple truth:  The more bad beats you encounter, the luckier you are.  It's a sign that you are playing against opponents who continually take the worst of it, and if you can't beat someone who always takes the worst of it, you can't beat anyone." Lou Krieger
  • God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players (i.e., everybody), to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch-dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a Dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time." Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman (Good Omens)
  • "Hold'em, like life itself, has its defining moment. It's the flop. When you see the flop, you're looking at 71 percent of your hand, and the cost is only a single round of betting." Lou Krieger
  • "The guy who invented poker was bright, but the guy who invented the chip was a genius." Anon
  • "Poker may be a branch of psychological warfare, an art form or indeed a way of life, but it is also merely a game, in which money is simply the means of keeping score." Anthony Holden
  • "The strong point in poker is never to lose your temper, either with those you are playing with or, more particularly, with the cards. There is no sympathy in poker. Always keep cool. If you lose your head you will lose all your chips." William J. Florence
  • "Limit poker is a science, but no-limit is an art. In limit, you are shooting at a target. In no-limit, the target comes alive and shoots back at you." Jack Strauss
  • "Aces are larger than life and greater than mountains." Mike Caro
  • "It never hurts for potential opponents to think you're more than a little stupid and can hardly count all the money in your hip pocket, much less hold on to it.” Amarillo Slim
  • "The smarter you play, the luckier you'll be." Mark Pilarski
  • "A Smith & Wesson beats four aces." Anon
  • "At gambling, the deadly sin is to mistake bad play for bad luck." Ian Fleming (Casino Royale)
  • "If you reraise a raiser, and he doesn't raise you back, you know he has kicker problems." Crandall Addington
  • "Nobody is always a winner, and anybody who says he is, is either a liar or doesn't play poker." Amarillo Slim
  • "Poker is generally reckoned to be America's second most popular after-dark activity. Sex is good, they say, but poker lasts longer." Alfred Alvarez
  • "Show me a good loser and I'll show you a loser." Stu Ungar
  • "A card player should learn that once the money is in the pot, it isn't his any longer." Herbert Yardley
  • "It is easy to smile at an insult and pretend it's funny when the person insulting you is hosing you with money." Alfred Alvarez
  • "It's hard work. Gambling. Playing poker. Don't let anyone tell you different. Think about what it's like sitting at a poker table with people whose only goal is to cut your throat, take your money, and leave you out back talking to yourself about what went wrong inside." Stu Unger
  • "Trust everyone, but always cut the cards." Benny Binion
  • "Avoid people with gold teeth who want to play cards." George Carlin
  • "The next best thing to gambling and winning is gambling and losing." Nick Dandalos
  • "Try to decide how good your hand is at a given moment. Nothing else matters. Nothing!" Doyle Bunson
  • "The single greatest key to winning is knowing thy enemy...yourself." Andy Glazer
  • "The winner is not the player who wins the most pots.  The winner is the player who wins the most money." Anthony Holden
  • "Opportunity may knock, but it seldom nags." David Mamet
  • "Put yourself in their shoes before you decide on the best way to take their shirts." David Sklansky
  • "Omaha is a game that was invented by a Sadist and is played by Masochists." Shane Smith
  • "You can shear a sheep many times, but you can skin it only once." Amarillo Slim
  • "Don't look at when a player sucks out on you with a trash hand as a loss. Think of it as an investment that will be returned with interest." Anon
  • "You will show your poker greatness by the hands you fold, not the hands you play." Dan Reed
  • "Never educate a stupid poker player." Anon
  • "Don't challenge strong players, challenge weak ones. That's what they're there for." John Vorhaus

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